From A to Z

Friends, there is a European pandemic and it appears to have been around for years. It is called "ThereIsNoSuchThingAsALine-itus" and there is no cure. People infected blatantly step in front of you while you are waiting at the cash register. They have vacant eyes, foam at the mouth and must, I said MUST, check out, get on the bus, get on the train, get on the tram, get through the door, cross the proverbial finish line, etc....before you. They can't help it, they were infected at birth. The WHO (World Health Organization) is baffled but has pin-pointed the gene that has been mutated. The "I will wait patiently for my turn" gene has become the "I don't give a rats ass if you were in front of me" in affected people.

Ok, ok, ok...so not all Europeans are rude and cut lines, but I am shocked by the push, shove, elbow in the gut or cut in line I experience on a daily basis. All my years of basketball have finally paid off, once a bench warmer, I now start in my very own basketball game everyday where I am the star center boxing the crap out of anyone who tries to do this to me.

Sadly, you do find yourself succumbing to this behavior on occasion or you would never get anywhere. Survival of the fittest at its best (or worst I suppose). I do however limit this behavior to emergency situations and I have even perfected a stare down. To shake things up, I purposely shove someone who is about to shove me, then turn on the doe eyes and say "oh, Entshuldigung!!!" That is German for excuse me...or "ha, winner winner, chicken dinner!".